So long, honey baby
Where I’m bound, I cannot tell
But goodbye’s too good a word
So I’ll just say “Fare thee well…”
–Bob Dylan “Don’t Think Twice It’s All Right“
We’ve been through a lot in our short life together, Moxie. But there comes a time when the best thing to do is to face the reality and know when a relationship has run its course. I can’t say that our life together has been without discord, without anger, without frustration and without mistakes. I can honestly say that I made most of the effort to make things workout…it was you, in the end, that failed me one too many times. It was you who left me sitting in my car, in the rain, in the snow, at a strange crossroads in the middle of a strange and lonely landscape or left me in my car, angled halfway into a “one-way” street…and I was going the wrong way. It was you, Moxie. It was you. I coudda been a contender, but you left me with no direction home, even when home was a cheap motel in Rutland, Vermont, or an RV park in Austin, Texas.
I know you tried your best…with what you had to work with. I fully understand that you always thought you were following directions from the Heavens, and in your own way, you were.
It was a strange threesome, me, my wife and you. When we first started bringing you into our lives, I, as a male, thought I heard a certain hint of seduction in your voice when you told us what to do. But, over the years, that sultry quality has given way to a more mechanical, robotic voice…Moxie, you lost your passion.
Maybe it was the name you resented?
When we first had you in the seat between us…when we would leave our home for a long strange trip, we didn’t know what to call you. You didn’t come with a name. You were a voice without a soul behind it. I wanted to give you a little bit of a tawdry history, make you a scarlet woman, a gypsy wanderer…so we came up with Moxie.
All Moxies are a little sassy. No one names their librarian-to-be daughter, Moxie. They named her Grace or Rose or Helen. But, you were always a Moxie to us.
But, as I said, all things must pass. Please don’t take this as an insult, but there are newer models available. Sleeker and more savvy. More feminine with a sexy voice to match. More power. Faster (although, in your day, you were plenty fast), but we need our new model with more memory and more color…more glamor, more bang for the buck and more bells and whistles for a man-of-the-road like me, who can fall into white-line fever at the drop of a toll token.
We don’t even have a name for our new model, yet. But, it won’t be Moxie, so don’t worry. You’ll always be Moxie to us…the only Moxie to have shared our lives.
I know someday, if things go south for us and time get tough, I’ll go back to looking for company in the honky-tonk saloons, dive bars and all the gin joints in the world. I may find myself on a ripped plastic covered bar stool next to you. We may pass each other as I leave a juke joint and you’re just going in. We’ll bump shoulders. I’ll look down. Will you speak to me? Will the day ever come when you forget our relationship? Will you be telling someone else where to go? where to turn? where to park?
I know this will sound harsh and cold and heartless, but your replacement has already made it to our RV bed. It’s ready to go and seems eager to talk to us and lead us on new adventures along the highways and byways of our aging life.
Thanks for the miles you traveled with us, Moxie. There’ll always be a place in our cigarette lighter to get a charge if you ever need it.
All you ever have to do is be a good gps to one man, one time, and you’ll make to the end of the road, babe. I’d like to be able to exist without your services, travelers relied on maps for centuries before satellites…but’s it’s a new complicated world out there. It’s freedom I’d like to have. After all, they say that ‘freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose’, but we all know that it doesn’t take much to see that the problems of three people don’t amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.
Don’t think of this as the end. Think of it as a well deserved rest.
Good bye and good luck, Moxie. Sorry it had to end this way.
All our love and memories,
Pat and Mariam.
We have all met Moxie, eh. And then we miss Moxie